correct(ed) web

Some people wear leather and beg their master to drag them by a chain on all four. And some people come back to the Zend Framework again and again.

When you’re actually a closet masochist and you’re ashamed to tell your partner that doggy style is boring you can use Zend Framework.

It might be late, I might be tired and drowsy, but spending 2 (two) hours to bootstrap a framework just because there are 78 ways of doing and the official documentation assumes you are one of the people who wrote it is plain stupid.

Don’t get me wrong, I preffer using it to starting from scratch (not that using ZF actually gives you anything that does SOMETHING, but at least it provides a contract that you sign, to write cleaner code) but ZF must have been born out of frustration. Someone read Martin Fowler’s site and said: OMG, Class Factory!!! WOW, Singleton, DUDE, we gotta get THIS in!

And then they kept on reading. And reading. And reading. Then they released version X. Then they read some more. Then they met a java guy. What?, you got a framework now? Do you have lazy initialization? NO? Php sucks. Then they added that. Then they met a ROR guy. Then they added whatever that guy laughed them at for not having. I guess you can see where I’m heading with this.

ZF has become a crash course in design patterns. Name a pattern and you can find it. With a twist, even, with at least 2 layers of abstraction too many. Ok, why should you care if it works? Read the API docs and use it, fool, the good people have given you a tool.

I agree. But whats the point of complicating things like bootstrapping is beyond my comprehension. You now have something like, and I gotta quote this:

Zend_Application’s second area of responsibility is executing the application bootstrap. Bootstraps minimally need to implement Zend_Application_Bootstrap_Bootstrapper

…

This API allows the bootstrap to accept the environment and configuration from the application object, report the resources its responsible for bootstrapping, and then bootstrap and run the application.

It might just be me, but I needed to read that 3 or 4 times to get some of it. What it basically means is that if you want to ride a bike to get from point A to point B and you think you need a bike from that, you’re stupid. No. You must use the Auto_Super_Dupper_Mega_Bike_Generator which will build a machine with 4 pedals, which you work with your hands and legs at once, which builds a bike with 6 wheels (because if  2 wheels take you from A to B in time t, 6 wheels will do that in t/3, right?) ON THE SPOT, stick it in your ass and throw you towards point B.

Thats’s how i feel right now about the Bootstrap class in Zend Framework 1.9.x

I will write some more with actual solutions to get an application that users Doctrine off the ground. Yes, I know there are at least 10 articlesc out there that tell you how to do that. Some of them are outdated in terms of ZF or Doctrine or both, some of them just don’t provide what I need and so on. But don’t mind me, read them ALL, you will only be confused.

I will stick to using ZF for this nice personal project I have in mind and which I try and detail as it goes on. What does that say about my sex life?

Tags: boostrapping, doctrine, patterns, php, zend framework

This entry was posted on Saturday, February 20th, 2010 at 12:57 am and is filed under Development. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.